Fired from work how to survive stress. How to survive being fired. Prepare for a new job

The current situation on the labor market is far from ideal - in many companies, not only are they reducing plans for recruiting new employees, but they are also reducing staff. Not in all cases, dismissals take place in compliance with all the nuances of labor legislation. A real situation prompted us to write this article - one of the victims of such a dismissal told about her story. After she handed in the report for the first quarter, she was told that she was fired, forced to write a statement and literally “squeezed out” from her workplace. That same evening, an ambulance was called to her - her heart ached, her blood pressure rose. A few days have passed - health problems continue. We decided to figure out who can get into this situation and what needs to be done next.

There are several reasons why you may be the victim of sudden layoffs:

1. Victim of reduction. The most common option at the present time. Things at the company are not going too well, the management decides to reduce part of the staff, and divide its functions among the remaining ones. There is a chance to talk with management and convince, if not of irreplaceability, then of postponing dismissal - but it is scanty. You still have to look for a job.
2. Someone else is taking your place. It may not necessarily be someone's relative or acquaintance. Perhaps management felt that in a crisis situation you are less effective than another specialist. You are being sacrificed to the strategic interests of the company. The situation is hopeless, it is better to negotiate with management for your own benefits in exchange for your accommodatingness - either a longer term for “leaving” your position, or for severance pay. If you managed to bargain - use the situation to the fullest for further employment. And do not forget to maintain normal relations with colleagues and management.
3. Leader's sacrifice. There are two subtypes here. In the first case, you and your manager simply have a mutual (or one-sided - and you don’t even know about it) personal dislike. The leader is forced to tolerate you as long as the company needs you (due to the affection of the highest management, personal high qualifications, or key participation in an important project). As soon as circumstances change, you are fired. In the second case, the leader changes - and a new one comes with his team. And there is no place for you in this new team.
4. You don't fit into the current situation. Perhaps the company is changing faster than you, it is difficult for you to work in constant changes. Or vice versa, you are sure that you know everything better than anyone and have ceased to value your work - you have become defiantly careless and this irritates the management. You have begun to ignore important areas of work and do not notice it. The result is the same - they part with you.

What to do if you are the victim of a layoff? If one morning, when you come to work, instead of the usual greeting, you hear from your boss an indistinct request to go into the office, where you are confronted with the fact: “You are fired!”. Even if the boss delicately tried to convey the “verdict”, and you are not a naive young lady, stress and negative emotions caused by such resignation are secured. It is especially unpleasant when there are no visible reasons for dismissal, and you are forced to write a letter of resignation.

So, what you need to do to survive this unpleasant event:

1. Don't fall into despair. If you have been fired from your job, do not fall into despair, collect your thoughts and think that this is just a job, and life does not end there. No need to narrow your whole life to the size of a desk. Don't go into deep thought about what you did wrong. Such questions will arise in your mind, but don't let them occupy all your thoughts. This situation is already over, and you are not yet ready to draw conclusions for the future. Extraordinary endurance, optimism, calmness under the most difficult circumstances - all those qualities that will help you survive the dismissal from work.
2. Leave with dignity. No need to splash out emotions on colleagues or, even worse, throw a tantrum with a scandal to management. Act as if you yourself decided to quit. Thank your colleagues for their cooperation, put your documents and workplace in order.
3. Don't consider yourself a failure. Your dismissal does not make you a failure or a bad specialist. Perhaps this happened for reasons beyond your control. In order not to unsettle yourself and not engage in self-flagellation, instead of self-blame, remember your merits, victories and achievements. Add to this a list of your accomplishments that stayed with you after you lost your job: family, children, friends, hobbies and experiences. You will see that you have not lost everything, but only a part (perhaps not the best) of your life, which you will replace with a new one.
4. Find time for yourself. After you lose your job, you don't have to look for a new one right away. Don't go to interviews with a pained face and don't beg for a job. Relax, take time and attention to loved ones, take care of your own health. In no case do not go on about emotions and do not drown your problem in alcohol.

Even if you are unemployed, try to follow the same routine of the day that you had at work. Only "working time" should be spent trying to get a new job. For a new job to be more successful, you need to work on the mistakes, no matter how painful it is. Try to figure out what in the dismissal depended on you and what did not. If you realize that you partly gave rise to a dismissal - not making enough effort, being late, and so on - try not to repeat this at a new job.

Being fired from a job is no longer a rarity, and more and more people are trying to figure out how to survive parting with a position. The termination of the contract is not always caused by the lack of the necessary professional qualities; for completely different reasons, ambitious and talented people leave their jobs. Psychologists give some advice on how to survive the dismissal from work.

First wave of emotions

When a person hears the phrase "You're fired", the range of emotions can be varied from resentment to rage. Don't let off steam right in front of your superiors, shedding tears or pounding your fists on the table. In many cases, it will be more beneficial to leave the workplace with dignity. If the dismissal seems unfair, the dispute can be resolved in the labor inspectorate or in court.

For reference! By decision of the court, you can be reinstated and receive compensation for the time of forced rest. This right is enshrined in Article 392 of the Labor Code.

In most cases, management seeks to gently part with employees, so you can safely demand compensation or letters of recommendation. By resolving the conflict in your favor, you can feel more confident and, if you wish, go in search of a new job.

Reorganize in a new way

When the employment contract is terminated, you need to take time to recover. Everyone who was fired experienced a bit of disappointment and was dissatisfied with themselves. Many do not tell their relatives and friends about what happened, which is fundamentally wrong - you need to speak out, release emotions and look at the situation from a different angle.

Advice! Psychologists say that by repeating a story over and over, a person becomes more aware of his feelings, and eventually begins to perceive what is happening less sharply. Gradually, the very fact of dismissal will cease to be significant, which means that there will be nothing to worry about.

Pouring out his soul to his interlocutors, a person begins to understand what caused the dismissal. If this is a lack of professionalism or competence, it makes sense to take refresher courses and read professional literature. A good solution would be to change the type of activity.

As for the cases when the employer initiated a dismissal order due to a difference in views, then a couple of days is enough to restore peace of mind.

On the way from the old job to the new one

Upon learning of the impending dismissal, many regard it as an extraordinary vacation. But psychologists strongly advise not to postpone the search indefinitely - the absence of the usual load can cause neurosis or depressive disorder.

Being a long period in search of work, a person imperceptibly falls into depression. A negative attitude prevents you from successfully passing interviews, soon, and the desire to work disappears. Internal experiences are transferred to the body, and psychosomatic disorders may appear.

Interesting! You can often notice how a person who has lost his job or retired is rapidly aging, more often than usual falls ill.

Free time should be put to good use!

If you can’t quickly get a job in a new company, you shouldn’t cool off and waste your free time in vain. It is necessary to adhere to the usual daily routine, filling the schedule with new cases:

• learning foreign languages;
• reading fiction;
• hobby;
• sports;
• visiting doctors.

Employment

Going to the interview, you should be mentally prepared. Whatever the reasons for leaving a previous position, you should not speak negatively about a former employer. Briefly and as dispassionately as possible describe the situation. It is advisable to focus on your professional qualities and achievements.

Advice! If there is a link to a “bad” article in the work book, you can make a duplicate of it at the penultimate place of work without an unflattering entry.

When communicating with a new boss, you should carefully ask about job responsibilities and privileges. It is irrational to agree to the very first proposals - you need to evaluate working conditions, wages and the amount of work. When expectations correspond to reality, you can send to the personnel department for employment.

Retirement

Finding what to do after being fired is the hardest thing for retirees. Elderly people are practically not invited to work, and it is extremely difficult to find a job again, especially in a profession.

In addition, age makes itself felt, and often apathy follows dismissal from a favorite position, and the risk of depression increases. On the other hand, many see a plus in dismissal, after many years of service, they finally begin to take care of themselves, find new hobbies.

At first, you should spend more time communicating with former colleagues, not moving away from them. Gradually, you need to understand yourself and understand what you wanted to do all your life besides your profession - it can be creating oil paintings, breeding purebred dogs, traveling the world and much more.

In no case should you lock yourself up, make yourself an endless weekend, consisting of gatherings on the couch. The more things are planned for the day, the more you can get positive emotions and new experiences.

Have you been fired from your job? Listen to advice on how to survive and build new life.

You know, there is such a peculiar scale that characterizes the level of a person's feelings in connection with the occurrence of a specific stressful situation. So, according to this scale, dismissal from a job you love without your own will is one of the most severe nervous shocks for a person, second only to the death of a relative or divorce.

What can be advised in such a situation? How to deal with being fired from a job you love? Try to gather all your willpower into a fist and leave with dignity, avoiding proceedings, insults, without destroying either your nervous system or your now former colleagues.

It is on your behavior and inner mood in this difficult period of time that it largely depends on how your life path will turn.

Swallow the grudge and leave beautifully!

Agree, leaving work not of your own free will, but at the direction of your superiors, you really want to slam the door, and before that tell your former boss everything you think about him. And somehow to play a dirty trick, remove the necessary information from the database or take the contacts of serious clients with you, which will lead to temporary problems in the work of a once such a native organization.

Don't give in to fleeting desire! This can be harmful in the future, when your new potential boss decides to check in with your previous job and hears far from unflattering reviews about you.

Rest assured, you will be able to survive the layoff. Just swallow your resentment, say goodbye to the team only with warm words, and let just such a bright image remain in the memory of your colleagues before leaving. No wonder they say that the first and last words are usually remembered.

Who is at risk of being fired?

Unfortunately, the sudden loss of a job negatively affects self-esteem. A person has a feeling of undeserved resentment and loss of strength of life positions. He asks: “Why did they do this to me?”, "I mean nothing, and nothing depends on me", How to survive being fired from a job you love?. If such thoughts have appeared in your head, try to pull yourself together and convince yourself that life does not consist solely in this lost work. Now it would be more correct to realize the reasons that the situation turned out this way for you, draw the right conclusions in order to survive the dismissal, and build a plan for further action.

An interesting fact is that in most cases two completely opposite types of people lose their jobs. These are those who for a long period of time simply do not want to change anything in their lives, although the work has long been tired and does not bring any positive emotions and good money. The person himself does not dare to write a statement, but he goes to work like hard labor. In this case, dismissal due to downsizing or other grounds is only good. A person receives the same impetus for change, which he has unconsciously been waiting for a long time.

But the second type is workaholics, for whom the loss of a job is tantamount to the loss of the meaning of life. The reason for dismissal here often lies in the excessive zeal of the employee and the unwillingness of the management to allow a higher level of professionalism from someone, fear of competition.

Start your job search as soon as possible

Losing a job frees up a fairly large chunk of time that was previously occupied. At the beginning, this is even good, you can relax and redo all those things that you usually put off until later. However, the very fact of why this free time appeared brings thoughts back to feelings of undeserved dismissal, and it is not possible to relax properly. Hence the mental anguish, depression, neurosis, which in turn prevent them from finding a new job. A vicious circle is formed, often observed by psychologists, if you do not destroy which, you can bring yourself to a serious illness. What does this state of being observed not only in those who have been laid off, but also in those who have simply become pensioners, who, having felt their "unloaded" begin to instantly grow old and suffer from various diseases.

The advice of psychologists to avoid this condition is to find a new job as soon as possible. The sooner you find a new use for yourself, the sooner you forget the old activity. Take the situation in which you find yourself as a chance to start a new life, achieve new successes, build a new career.

Live by the rules

It is quite correct during the period of looking for a new job and the desire to survive the dismissal from your favorite job, behavior is built according to the following rules:

Continue to live according to the previously set modes. Get up in the morning at the same time as before, and eat at the previously set hours. If you are a man, be sure to shave in the morning, if you are a woman, do your hair and makeup.

Every day, take action to find a new job - look for relevant ads on specialized sites on the Internet, send out, go for interviews.

In your free time, you go in for sports, do not stick around in front of the TV, get enough sleep, and be more often in the fresh air. If you know about some of your sores, try to treat them during the period of time that you have freed up. Finish all the chores around the house that you used to put off until later due to lack of time and not much desire.

Stay away from loved ones

Often, during such forced inactivity, when a person experiences severe psychological experiences and looks for those responsible for what happened around him, his relationships with friends and relatives deteriorate. At the same time, gradual cooling is observed precisely from the side of loved ones. Who wants to communicate with a person who is in a deep depression and closed in on his problems, who is so hard to survive the dismissal?

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Therefore, try not to erase yourself from the lives of friends and relatives with your behavior, solve some problems together, do not refuse invitations to visit or travel together, perform some duties that others have previously taken on.

Try to survive the dismissal, find some kind of part-time job, while continuing to look for the main job. After all, temporary, if everything works out well for you, can become permanent.

Learn from others to overcome difficulties

Do not forget that life is unpredictable, today you are in a difficult situation, it is difficult for you to survive being fired from your favorite job, and tomorrow everything can turn radically, and now you are already on a horse and ahead of everyone. This happens even to very famous people. An example of this is the world-famous singer Julio Iglesias, who started out as a highly successful soccer player in the Madrid Real Madrid, but having got into a car accident, he lost the opportunity to continue his career. And only having listened to the advice of friends, he took up the art of singing, in which he succeeded so much.

The story of one accountant who was accused of illegal spending of money and put behind bars was not nearly more interesting. In prison, having nothing to do, he began to write stories, and he came out as a famous writer, taking on the pseudonym O "Henry.

It's better not to do that

Try to avoid behavior that will sooner or later lead you to lose your job, namely:

Live inertly, without making plans for the future;
Do not develop your professional skills;
Do not strive to achieve any results;
Be confident in your indispensability;
Have flatterers in your environment;
Do not take into account the merits of others;
Don't let others know about your accomplishments.

By the way

The psychological stress resulting from being fired is much more pronounced in men than in women. The latter are more resistant to difficult life turns and can quickly survive the dismissal from their favorite job. It is extremely hard to endure the dismissal of pensioners, as well as people within certain age limits: at the age of 33-37 and 46-54. Also, the degree of experience directly depends on. People with a temperamental, cheerful, open character endure the problem of job loss much faster. They are also worried about this, but they cope with it within a couple of weeks. But it is much more difficult for closed, uncommunicative individuals to survive the dismissal, they can experience stress for a much longer period.

Such an event really knocks out of the usual rut, dozens of questions instantly flash in my head: “Why me?”, “What did I do wrong?”.

Self-esteem falls, mood is at zero and faith in a bright future for some reason instantly evaporates and turns into unrealizable hopes. Psychologists even argue that dismissal from work is really a strong stress that must be experienced correctly in order to avoid unpleasant, and sometimes dangerous, consequences.

5 important steps

How to survive a layoff? This question gnaws at everyone who finds themselves in such a situation, and it doesn’t matter at all whether you knew about it in advance or the news hit you like snow on your head. To come to a successful final, a person has to go through 5 stages, each of which, in its own way, is important and necessary.

At the first stage, a person is only partially aware of the seriousness of the situation, being in a state of shock, awareness comes only at the second stage. Here anger, resentment and misunderstanding catch up. There are a thousand questions in my head, self-esteem is slowly but surely tending to zero, and, as a result, a natural feeling of aggression and anger at the former bosses may arise.

It is at the second stage that a burning desire to “win back in the end” may arise: to tell the authorities everything that you think about him, to annoy the company, for example, hide some necessary data or delete customer numbers. Naturally, over time, everything will be restored, but an extremely negative opinion will form about you.

You shouldn't do anything like that! Gather your will into a fist and remember that the professional circle in one city is always rather narrow, which means that your future bosses can find out about all your “achievements”, which can affect your future career growth.

Do you need it? If you leave with your head held high, with best wishes and a friendly smile, who knows, sometimes the bosses have a habit of changing their minds, or at least you can get hold of a good recommendation.

The next step is bidding. Here such thoughts arise: “If I had finished the annual report on time…”, “If I had been friendlier with the team…” and so on. “If, yes, but…” no longer makes much sense, step over this stage, leave everything in the past, but take with you the conclusions regarding your professional activities, perhaps they will be useful to you in a new workplace.

The fourth stage is depression. It makes no sense to explain and describe it, almost every one of us fell into a similar state. The last number is acceptance. Finally, having realized and experienced all the sorrows, you are ready to move on, at this stage, a person can even see a certain logic in his dismissal and sees the advantages of what happened.

In words, everything seems to be simple, but how to survive it in reality? To begin with: give yourself every right to go through all these five stages, it is better to go through them immediately than to get confused in your own negative emotions and push the problem away, leaving it without a solution. Unfortunately, there are many cases when, after being fired, a person is completely lost and does not find the strength in himself for new achievements.

Most often, this risk group includes people who are at critical stages of life, usually the age of 34-36 years, and then 49-52, 55-57 years. Sooner or later, you will come to the stage of acceptance, however, it is important to try to shorten the whole path to it: for this, give yourself a setting about the end of each stage. For example, three days for each state: maybe at first it will seem strange to you, but as a result, logic will prevail over feelings.

What do you need to know?

So it happened. First you need to deal with the important design points that can play for or against you in the future.

• Dismissal at will. Most often, it is made out that way, even if this desire was not entirely one's own. If, for example, a person is fired for not coping with his own work and the employer can prove this, then this option will be the best solution. But if a person is fired simply for downsizing, then in this situation you may not wait for the due compensation. The dismissal for reduction must be warned in advance, terms are agreed, and the warning is attached in writing. But for an employee who is forced to sign backdated documents, it is better to consult with lawyers and sign anything in advance.
• By agreement of the parties. The most profitable option for an employee: it clearly states the date of dismissal, while all the necessary payments are made (full payment, compensation for vacation that was not used, the remaining salary). Registration with the labor exchange is easier, and benefits are calculated as quickly as possible.

Perhaps, in the same place on the exchange, it will be possible to take refresher courses, which will increase your chances of finding a new job. It will not be superfluous to compile a high-quality resume, send it to employment sites, and also pass interviews in a couple of cadastral devices.

From the point of view of psychology

Often, after a hard dismissal, a person wants to relax: lie down on the couch, eat plenty of sweets and goodies, sleep until dinner, and so on. Of course, you can allow such a rest, but, most importantly, that it does not stretch indefinitely.

Do not forget that the received calculation will end soon, and you will not receive a new salary, and is it really possible to hang on the neck of your own family? In particular, this applies to men.

In order not to completely “fall apart”, be sure to follow the daily routine: get up at the appointed time, have breakfast and put yourself in order, actively look for work and, since you have free time, do what you always lacked it for.

For example, learn something new, tidy up the garage, tidy up household chores that have never been done before. Use your free time to put your health in order: follow the regime, do not watch TV until late, go outside every day and, if possible, do jogging.

Do not forget that the days off, as before, are Saturday and Sunday, the rest of the time you should be busy, as it was before when you worked. Browse job sites daily, send out as many resumes as possible, go to interviews and remember that the more companies you call today, the more answers you will get tomorrow.

And one more thing: learn to perceive dismissal not as a cruel joke of fate, but as a sign that it is time for you to move on, who knows, perhaps this is a kind of sign, a chance to find a place with better earnings or a team.

In the process of searching better work many faced the need to change jobs. It is good if this happened by mutual agreement of the parties: the employer and the employee. But what if your plans did not include leaving your familiar place in the next couple of years? Dismissal is not a pleasant thing, therefore it is often accompanied by a long chain of changes in emotional states.

Psychologists note that a person who has just been fired or made redundant goes through several stages after losing a job.

Resentment

Of course, the first of these is resentment. We all have this feeling. Together with feelings and thoughts about the days spent, energy, and often health that had to be left outside the company, such an employee, of course, regrets what happened and mentally tries to find mistakes in his actions.

It is good if the dismissed employee directs his resentment mainly to the incompetence of his offender and will reinforce his arguments with an undeserved insult. Much sadder will be the consequences of self-flagellation and remorse, which can lead to prolonged stress.

Euphoria

The next step to go through nervous system dismissed is the euphoria of sudden freedom.

A person bound by routine frameworks suddenly feels all the charm of his free position. And since he is, in many ways, a victim of circumstances, there are fewer and fewer reasons for frustration. In addition, the entire labor market opens up before such a person, and he is ready for new searches.

Unpreparedness

And this is where the problem of emotional unpreparedness often arises.

A laid-off employee subconsciously tries to find a clone of his old firm, and when he encounters new obligations that require more advanced or additional work, it becomes difficult to get used to the old routine. Hence the reluctance to try something new for yourself, and as a result, a long search and unsuccessful interviews.

Of course, wasted time and nerves, reproaches from relatives or questions from friends negatively affect the general mood and enthusiasm.

Apathy

Thus, a new stage begins - this is apathy.

I don't want to do absolutely nothing. I want to go with the flow and sit at home without getting out. Someone goes through this stage quite quickly, and some have to wait several years for a “kick” from life circumstances, when finding a job turns not into a hobby, but into an urgent need.

To alleviate the condition of a dismissed person, psychologists recommend supporting him, but this must be done correctly.

For example, if you find out that your friend or loved one has recently been fired, then it is better to refrain from commenting and asking questions until he himself wants to bring up this topic.

Psychological support

At the job search stage, the job seeker needs support and encouragement. Since any new activity will scare him away, you should not show close interest in the desired new position, and also focus on the disadvantages of the proposed vacancy, so as not to shake the sense of confidence of the person who is looking for.

You can help the dismissed person in compiling a competent resume, with registration on job search sites, as well as with sending his candidacy to company e-mails.