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What should I do if I envy other people? How to stop envying someone else's family happiness

Every person has their own shortcomings. Someone struggles with addictions, someone cannot control outbursts of anger, and for someone, envy is a problem. Getting rid of the last vice is not so easy. But, with effort and a conscious approach to the issue, you can achieve positive results. How to deal with envy? Find tips below.

Know how to appease your desires

What is the problem of a person who is always jealous of everyone? The fact that a person always wants something very passionately. The stronger the fire of desire to possess some thing or ability burns in your soul, the less likely you are to get what you want. Why? A person who spends a lot of time thinking about a better life will never get it. After all, in order to achieve something, you need to make a lot of effort.

How to deal with envy? Stop beating yourself up. Let's take an example. You desperately want a car. But recently, your friend's parents bought the perfect car. Now you want to have a personal car even more than before. You curse fate because your parents don't have the opportunity to buy you a car, and complain that you don't have a boyfriend who could give you an expensive gift. Such thoughts will not bring you closer to your dream. You never had a car, and never will.

How to learn not to envy? Instead of lying on the couch and visualizing a car, get busy. A person who is passionate about something does not have time for stupid thoughts. The car for him is a goal, not a dream. A person deliberately works hard all day long to acquire a personal vehicle.

There will always be those who are worse off than you.

This thought may not be comforting to everyone, but still it helps when it gets really bad. Don't know how to deal with envy? Then think about those people who are less fortunate in life than you. Do you want the latest iPhone or an es-class car? Reduce your appetites. Think about those people who live somewhere in Africa. Compared to them, you live in paradise. You have something to eat and access to good drinking water. You have a roof over your head, people who love you, and a job you love. You are a happy person, but you just don't want to notice it.

When you begin to realize that some people in life will never reach the level of comfort that you currently have, it somehow becomes much easier to live on. Anxious thoughts leave, and it is much easier to fall asleep. It is not necessary to practice such mantras too often, but when you feel especially bad, you can use this method of self-healing, it works flawlessly.

listen to gossip less

When does a person become jealous? The moment he finds out that another person has got what he can only dream of now. Don't want a nasty feeling to arise in your soul? Then stop listening to gossip. It is they who bring confusion to a calm and measured life. Evil tongues can exaggerate the amount of earnings of a person, they can attribute to a person dignity that he does not have.

Rumors are false information and cannot be trusted. Are you still not sure how to deal with envy? Stop wasting your time washing other people's bones. Do not read the yellow press and spend less time on Instagram. You may become jealous not of something real, but of something illusory. By posting their photos on social networks, people photograph only the best moments, and sometimes they overcome a lot of troubles for the sake of a beautiful shot. Therefore, do not judge a person by his photographs. It may be an illusion of a beautiful life and have nothing to do with reality.

Boost your self-esteem

Who suffers from the envy of others? Persons who have low self-esteem. A person who respects himself, appreciates and loves, will not condescend to envy. But people who cannot control their thoughts and doubt themselves all the time can forever be dissatisfied with their lives.

Remember, envy is a bad feeling and you need to get rid of it. How? Take a sheet and write down on it all your best character traits, abilities and skills. Remember everything, the list should be impressive. And now every day look at a piece of paper and remember what is written there. You should be proud of yourself.

If you cannot be proud of the successes achieved in the past, then try to realize yourself in the present. Write a list of goals and start walking towards them. Each time you reach one of them, you will feel better and more confident.

Stop comparing yourself to others

What do most parents do to their children? The fact that they form the beginnings of envy in the child. Adults do it unconsciously. They constantly force the child to compare himself with others. For example, you brought home a B in math, remember what your mother said. First, she found out what grades all classmates received, and depending on this, she praised or scolded that the diary had 4, not 5. This is how you developed the ability to constantly compare yourself with someone.

But after all, everyone wants happiness for themselves, so you have to compare your person with successful people. And here the habit can go sideways. Envy will arise. A bad feeling will rise automatically in your soul when you notice that the person you are comparing yourself to has something that you lack.

How to avoid this misunderstanding? Stop comparing yourself to others. Every time you want to do this, think about why you will do this stupid mental work, which will also bring disappointment. Let's assess ourselves, compare yourself today with yourself yesterday. Then you will get an objective understanding of your own abilities.

Don't feed your envy

What is the main problem In that they are similar to masochists. Both are deliberately hurting themselves. But only the latter get pleasure from it, while the former are tormented by the consciousness of their insignificance. Have you ever thought: she has everything in her life, and a career, and a family, and children, but what do I have?" Such thoughts visit the heads of girls who do not know what to do with themselves at their leisure. The less you think about others, so much the better. Focus on your own life and improve it. No one will do the work for you, no one will improve your knowledge, skills and appearance. If you have any problems, take the trouble to solve them. Because you will envy others, your problems will not disappear, but will only get worse.

Get rid of gossip, stop any conversation that begins with the phrase "I heard that Lenka ...". Say you're not interested in rumors. Stop admiring the beautiful life in magazines and on the Internet. Showy pictures of happiness will definitely not console you.

Stop thinking that life is unfair

How do lazy people console themselves? Do they think that you have noticed that a person who studied with C's at school, more often than excellent students, settles down very well in life? Persons who have only secondary education open their own firms and occupy leadership positions. And what do former excellent students do? They work for former C students.

Why is it that smart people who have spent many years on their education rarely receive dividends? The thing is that while excellent students study at universities, three students get to know life. They learn to connect with people, spend a lot of time thinking, and then apply the developed plan into practice. The first time they most often fail, but they do not despair, and try the second, third and fourth time. Excellent students are afraid to take decisive action, so they often remain in the position of hired workers.

The next time you have the thought, "I envy my friend, why is life so unfair?", chase her away. Every person deserves the happiness that he has. So your friend has worked harder to get and keep what she has.

Complain less

What do people who are unlucky in life look like? These creatures are constantly unhappy. They revel in their grief and talk about it at every opportunity. Do you think they like this state of affairs? Not at all. After all, everyone wants to be healthy, happy and successful. But why do some achieve all this, while others only envy? Because some work to pave the way to their own happiness, while others do nothing but complain about failures.

Do you think that in the life of those whom you envy, there are no failures? The better a person lives, the more painfully he endures various tragedies. But one person can proudly endure the blows of fate, while the other will not withstand the pressure. Man is to blame for all his troubles. Therefore, do not envy the one who is strong and rich. These people deserve happiness. And you will be able to rise to their height if you do not complain to others about problems. The more you think about adversity, the more you attract adversity into your life. Stop doing this and see that your dreams will come true, and you will no longer have to envy.

Always look for the positive

No matter how bad your life is, you can always find the positive in your life, and not in someone else's. Why does a person get jealous? When there is no order in your life and it seems that things are falling out of your hands, you really want to plunge into a fairy tale in order to escape from the routine. Many people watch series or movies. In them, the characters live happily and carefree. The feeling of envy grows involuntarily. Why is it always so good in movies and bad in real life? It's very easy to help yourself. Do not look at such pictures, it is better to spend time on finding the positive in your own life. There is always something good, you just have to find it.

For example, when you get up in the morning in a great mood, note this fact and do not take it for granted. Have you easily collected the child in the kindergarten? Consider it a success. Such household trifles are overlooked by many, in pursuit of some invisible and incredibly great happiness. Pay attention to the little things that fill your day. It is from them that life is made. Having learned to see the positive, the thought “People live!” will slip less and less in you!

Try to be happy for your loved ones

Think about the last time you sincerely spoke words of approval to any person. A person has shared joy with you, what do you need to do? The person who talks about positive change in life, wants to hear words of support and congratulations. It is not difficult for you to show warmth and tell a person that you are sincerely happy for her. Try not only to feel this joy in words, but also to feel it in your soul. It can be very difficult, but when you learn to be happy for others, the feeling of envy will begin to weaken. And why envy if you understand that a person deserves what he got?

How to stop being jealous and live your life? Put your mind in order. Remember that the more you give, the more you get.

Look for inspiration in envy

A person who is kind by nature can also be envious. How can a pleasant person experience such an unfortunate feeling? People are not angels, so they tend to make mistakes and do those things for which they will be ashamed later. But any mistake and any unpleasant feeling can be turned to your advantage, not to your detriment. Look at this quote about envy:

When envy is unavoidable, it should be used as a stimulus for one's own efforts, and not as a hindrance to others. Russell Bertrand.

Embrace this rule and compliment those people whose lives you admire. Let envy help you become better, and not drag you to the bottom.

Improve Yourself

Envy is not good, so stop doing it. The first step that anyone who begins to struggle with a disgusting quality of his character must take is self-improvement. Are you jealous of a more experienced colleague? Then take special courses, and you will get the same knowledge that will help you in your work. Are you jealous that your friend is a better cook than you? Practice more often, and over time you will also be able to make a culinary masterpiece. No amount of envy prayers will help if you don't cultivate yourself. Only by working on yourself, you can become better and increase your self-esteem. So, you will become the person whom you could only envy before.

Few people like to experience envy, but it seems impossible to overcome it. Are there those who are somehow magically spared from this corrosive feeling? Or did each of us grind our teeth at least from time to time, barely holding back our anger towards a person who is much more successful and happier? And it’s especially annoying when the object of envy is the same age as you. Here, comparisons cannot be avoided, and what happens: at 25 you are still sitting at the job where you got a job after graduation, and the other one already has his own good business, a cool car and a family vacation abroad! Envy! Familiar? Then these tips are for you, they will help, if not to get rid of the unpleasant feeling completely, then at least dull it.

1. You often have no idea how the people whose success you envy actually live. Think about it: maybe all their success is just an appearance, nothing more.

2. Stop focusing on others, focus on your inner development. Being preoccupied with the success of others robs you of time that you can spend on achieving your own goals.

3. What is success for you? Do you believe in that cliché that most aspire to: "Success is a lot of money, position in society, family"? Give your definition of success. What exactly do you need? And strive for it.

4. By the way, be prepared sometimes to witness the epic picture of the complete destruction of the success of someone you once envied. It happens.

5. You won't do more than what you can do. If you are true to your life values ​​and give yourself completely to your work, then everything in your life will be as it should be. Do you hear? The way it should be.

6. If you are suddenly overtaken by a terrible bout of self-doubt, then write each of your doubts on a piece of paper. After reading them again, throw them in the trash and out of your head! Yes, and kick this trash to boot!

7. Work actively to learn to be grateful for what you have every morning. The happiest people are grateful for everything they have, and therefore live in strong harmony with their innate talents.

9. The universe is incredibly huge, deep and amazing, isn't it? How can you worry about a few hundred dollar raise when a supernova is being born somewhere at that very moment!

10. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Having reached the finish line, you will understand that all your life you have been trying to overtake only yourself.

Envy can poison life, because at every step there are happier, more successful, richer, more beautiful, younger people... Anything can be an object of envy. Comparing himself to others, the envious always experiences an oppressive feeling of his own inferiority.

How hard it is for someone who cannot sleep, knowing that someone lives much better than him! Envy is a certain sadness about the elementary success of acquaintances and just surrounding people.

Indeed, someone else's success and happiness makes many people feel a sharp lack of their own. This feeling is literally depressing, sometimes it just gnaws non-stop, torments and makes you feel like a deeply unhappy person.

As soon as it occurs to a person to compare himself, his achievements and successes with others, envy immediately appears, which really turns his life upside down: sleep disappears, a good mood disappears somewhere for a long time, and as a result, a person plunges into the deepest stress.

If envy is a constant companion in the life of some people, then they sometimes do not even remember their own merits and achievements, because their thoughts are occupied with serious thoughts about the success and luck of others.

In addition, envious people do not look at life with a clear look, and their eyes are as if covered with a veil, so they do not notice reality, and this leads to the fact that it seems to them that compared to other people, they are generally complete losers!

1. Learn to control your own thoughts

This is really important, because when the first signs appear that envy begins to penetrate your soul, you need to try to figure out where the roots of this feeling grow from.

Try to figure out what you really want. If the object of your envy is some material thing or some character trait, or something else, then try to switch your thoughts to how you can get it yourself or achieve something.

Perhaps you need to develop some of your own qualities in order to seriously increase the productivity of your work. If the feeling is so overly destructive for you that you already almost wish that that other person would even lose something, find the strength in yourself to stop your stream of thought and ask yourself a direct question: “Why think about this, why relive this again and test negative emotions, thereby depriving your own life of bright colors? Why do I need it?"

2. The best distraction is to get busy

Ordinary daily activities will help you get distracted from the thoughts that disturb you and stop feeling envy, you just need to seriously focus on them. Try to get rid of the habit of constantly comparing yourself with someone, constantly thinking about the successes and virtues of other people, because the foundation of any envy is a constant endless process of comparing yourself with others.

Switch your thoughts in a more positive direction - think exclusively about yourself, your own self-worth and your uniqueness. In addition, thoughts about how to become a better master of your craft are extremely positive. Wise people believe that the person who absolutely sincerely loves his work and devotes himself to it, does not experience the pangs of envy.

3. Monitor your progress

Look at them in general. As soon as your bright head is visited by the thought that someone has something extraordinary that you do not have, then immediately switch your thought processes to your own successes and achievements. You will definitely find something that the other person does not have and never had.

Learn to enjoy the simplest things, and finally understand that everyone has certain strengths or weaknesses, including you personally and the object of your negative feelings.

And to better understand yourself, just write down all your even small achievements on a piece of paper in the form of a large list. Remember absolutely everything, and you will definitely see that, in fact, you have much more than you could even imagine. And if something doesn’t quite suit you, then this is another reason to work on yourself.

4. Turn on the mind

If you can honestly admit to yourself that you are jealous of someone, you are a really smart person, and if you try to do at least something to get rid of this unproductive feeling, then you are not only smart, but really wise. And, despite the fact that our life is a kind of game ahead of the curve, but not everyone will get the main prize.

That is why the well-known Olympic principle that it is not the victory itself that is important, but participation, acquires an even deeper meaning here. In other words, live your own life the way you can, try to always be yourself, and let others live their lives. As soon as you realize this, universal peace will firmly settle in your soul, which cannot be bought even for the biggest money!

5. Find inspiration

Are there people in your environment who sincerely rejoice at your achievements and even the smallest successes? Appreciate them and let them be your personal source of inspiration.

6. Learn to do small things for others with absolute sincerity and from the bottom of your heart.

If any particular person is the source of your envy, then do something kind and very pleasant to him. Give a gift, help in something, just do a good deed.

You will notice that after that the person became joyful and happy, and you, seeing his good mood, suddenly realize that you are directly related to his happiness, then envy in your soul will be replaced by a great feeling of joy.

7. Get rid of envy will help mental self-regulation

Sometimes attacks of envy are unexpected and very powerful. In this case, the method of mental self-regulation will definitely help you. You just need to find a quiet and relatively comfortable place where you can be alone with yourself, close your eyes and completely relax.

Try to restore before your eyes such a picture where you felt true comfort and tranquility: a grandmother's house in the village, a seashore, a vacation in a forest clearing, in the mountains, or another place dear to your heart. Enjoy these positive emotions and hold them for such a long time until you have a feeling of complete confidence that everything is fine with you and there will still be a huge amount of such sensations in your life.

What to do if they envy you

It is hard to live not only with your own envy, but also with someone else's, directed specifically at you. In this case, some basic protection against envious people will definitely help you.

  1. Keep all your successes and achievements to yourself and do not share them with people who have been noticed in the manifestation of such a feeling.
  2. The negative feelings of envious people can disarm requests for help or just advice.
  3. Try to complain about your "serious" problems to such people. Let them know that you have not only success, that you are an ordinary person with a host of other manifestations of life.
  4. If you are faced with outright envy, then avoid rude clarification of any relationship - this will significantly aggravate the current situation, but it will definitely not help the case. It is much more useful not to make contact with such a person, but it is better to move away from him at a great distance.

By letting envy into your life and allowing it to unfold widely in your soul, as a result of such a symbiosis, you receive extremely destructive negative emotions that become a source of serious mistakes and problems.

And only you can get rid of these unproductive emotions: you don’t need to be an envious observer of the lives of strangers, but, on the contrary, you need to learn to thank life for what you already have - relatives, friends, work, health and little joys in life . Drive away envy from your life, and appreciate your own place on this Earth.

Envy is inevitable, it constantly manifests itself to a greater or lesser extent in every person. But it has a negative effect on us. Knowing how to stop being jealous of other people will help you take control of your life.

Envy is an emotion, as natural as any other, but you need to be able to control it and let it go in the right direction. Although envy is unavoidable from time to time, it should never turn into an obsession. As long as it's a fleeting thought that doesn't torment you, you have nothing to worry about. But if it becomes an obsession and interferes with your daily life, you really need to find a way to stop being jealous and control your emotions before it starts to interfere with your normal life.

Have you ever felt frustrated for no reason when a friend went after something you always wanted? If someone else's happiness or achievement bothers you, even if it has nothing to do with you, you probably feel jealous.

At work or in classrooms, you had to deal with people who always had happiness while you had the short end of the stick. Self-doubt, feelings of loss or fear of losing something or someone, envy, anger, and other unsightly emotions combine to form jealousy. Therefore, it is very important to learn how to control such an emotional imbalance and know how to stop being jealous.

If it seems to you that you are obsessed with other people's successes or failures, this means that you are jealous of this person.

How to stop being jealous of people?

Envy will never help you. You may be jealous of a friend because he met a gorgeous girl or because he got a promotion. But how will this change anything in your own life?

You can think it over and spend hours every day plotting revenge or hating someone because they are better than you or they are luckier. But you are wasting your time, and the one you envy doesn't even think about you. In the end, envy won't help you, and it certainly won't do you any good.

Some people are gifted with the best abilities, some work hard. Dedication and passion can help you achieve the same. A little envy that will stimulate you to achieve more will not hurt.

On the other hand, excessive envy will blind you and make you spend hours reflecting on circumstances that will never materialize. You will still be the same person who sits for hours in envious thoughts.

10 Tips on How to Stop Jealousy and Live Your Life

Use these ways to stop being jealous and divert all negative energy into something positive that will ultimately help you lead a better life.

1. Don't live in a world of comparisons

In this world, where the life of every person is open to everyone, anyone can be seen through social networks, it is easy to compare yourself with your peers and competitors. Although healthy competition is a good sign. If you want to be successful, be yourself. Compare your past with your present and try to improve every day. This will help you become a better person without feeling jealous.

2. Your accomplishments matter

Celebrate your own accomplishments, no matter how small. Rome was not built in one day. You can't hate someone else just because they're famous or make a lot more money than you. At some point they were at the same level.

Life is not easy. But with serious effort and dedication, you can reach your own heights. Base your happiness on your accomplishments, not on the successes of others, so you can stop being jealous.

3. Get involved in your life

Love yourself and respect your own life. If you are unhappy, choose a new career path that interests you. When you respect yourself, you will no longer be jealous. You will believe in your own abilities. If someone else is better than you, this is a reason to envy them only for competition and an example to work harder.

4. Ask yourself the truth

Why does it bother you if some other person achieves something better than you? There are so many people in the world. Why do you associate all your jealousy and triumphs with only one person? Aren't you too set and stuck worrying about small fights when there's a whole world of possibilities?

5. The world is unfair

Deal with it. Some people better life and the best opportunities. What are you going to do about it? There is nothing you can do except make your own progress.

6. Stop to be someone else

When you rejoice in other people's failures, you forget about your own successes. If you don't consciously work to achieve more, then you will remain just an envious person, because your happiness does not come from your own success, but from watching someone else fall.

7. Everyone has their highs and lows

Life isn't always perfect. While you may be jealous of someone for specific successes, there may be many other areas where you have a better life. Be realistic and try to see the truth for what it is. We all fail, just as we enjoy success. When you realize that you, too, have a great life, you can stop being jealous.

8. Don't waste your life

When you focus on someone else's life, you lose your own because you are too busy thinking about someone else's fame or happy moments. As you sink into your envy, you may hate someone because that someone is more successful, prettier, or gets more attention, but your life freezes and doesn't move on while you scatter your energy on other people. Concentrate on yourself to stop being jealous.

9. Be confident

Be confident and pursue your goals. Envy takes away your individuality, self-confidence and purpose. Curling is a way to accept failure. Why are you jealous? Don't you think that someday you will be able to achieve the same pleasures as the object of your envy? And will envy help you with this?

10. Envy comes from fear

What are you afraid of? Almost always, envy stems from a deep fear that you will never be able to achieve the same. The more jealous you are, the more you convince yourself that you will not be fine. If you do nothing, you will spend the rest of your life feeling like a failure. Turn envy into determination.

If you feel like your envy is out of control, how it will cripple your life from the inside. And when you're ready, use these 10 tips on how to stop being jealous of someone else's success. It can make the world very bright when you realize how useless jealousy is and how good it is to live your own life and not someone else's.

Do you want to stop living with an eye on others and constantly comparing yourself with a colleague who is an excellent student? Especially for you, we have compiled this step-by-step instruction that will save you from envy once and for all.

You are trying to smile. Of course, you are very happy for your colleague, she is great. Yes, she's definitely a good guy. She is never late, manages to do a huge number of things before the 17:55 checkpoints, go swimming, and it seems that today she once again talked about a new cheesecake recipe that she found on the Internet. Tomorrow she will certainly get up early, cook this miracle of cooking and bring it to the office to treat her beloved colleagues. Naturally, she will not eat herself - a pool on weekdays and a gym on weekends is impossible. You are still smiling, or rather, pretending to smile, but mentally imagine how you will take this cheesecake and send it to the trash with LeBron's filigree accuracy. These thoughts - they are very bad, you reproach yourself for them. Your life is no better. Yes, sometimes you are late. Sometimes at 17:55 you just realize that you haven't done even half of what you planned for today. Of course, there can be no talk of any culinary delights - buckwheat from a bag and a sluggish tomato from the refrigerator. And it’s not to say that you don’t like this way of life - you don’t like this upstart, this two-faced honors student who, apparently, never sleeps (otherwise how to do everything?) And never eats (otherwise how to be such a slim?).

Yes, you can talk a lot about the possible advantages of envy, say that in fact it stimulates, creates a precedent for competition and generally makes you always be in good shape. But, one way or another, this feeling is nothing more than a concentrated mixture of procrastination, dissatisfaction, greed and self-doubt. A person, comparing himself with someone, focuses precisely on what the other has, but he does not have. Moreover, the object of envy does not have to be some material thing, you can envy someone's appearance, success, and even performance. This feeling does not create, but destroys the personality, it turns a person into an insatiable consumer, who is always short of everything. A little imagination - and you can easily draw a picture for yourself where all this can lead. Hint: depression is just the beginning. The history of mankind is full of examples of people who, guided by their own gluttony and envy, destroyed the lives of millions.

in front of you step-by-step instruction, which will help overcome the feeling of envy and begin to appreciate yourself.

1. Analyze your feelings

Even the ancients said: happy is he who understands the cause of things. If you want to get rid of envy, first of all ask yourself a direct question: “Why do I feel it? What is its cause?”, and in 99 cases out of 100 you already have the answer ready. So the problem is not in finding it, but in voicing it - speaking with yourself the problem, you automatically recognize that it exists, which means that further denial is pointless. Now think about how this feeling affects you and your life. Perhaps you constantly go to the page of your ex-lover or sweetheart and review photos from his or her wedding twenty times, while you have not even had a hint of a relationship for more than a year. Or your best friend started her own blog dedicated to photography, and every time you look through it with gloating, deep down you dream of having at least a little of her organization and courage in order to finally try to do something of your own. Thus, envy takes up a lot of your time, fills your thoughts, and destroys your personal and work relationships, making you feel hatred and dissatisfaction. Enough tolerating this!

2. Express your feelings orally or in writing

The best way to deal with difficult feelings is to put them into words. Take a sheet of paper and describe the object of your envy in great detail. For example, a colleague at work shared the news with you - he bought a new car. What did you feel at that moment, what did you say to him and what would you really like to say. One way or another, words tend to simplify and generalize the phenomena they name. The words "lock" the feeling, which, it would seem, completely absorbed you, into the framework - now you are not struggling with something nameless and abstract, but solving a specific problem. Having a frank conversation with a close friend who listens carefully and tactfully asks the right questions has a similar effect. Choose exactly such a person whom you trust and who will support you in any situation. But just keep in mind that your friend should not be familiar with the very colleague you envy.

3. Don't scold or judge yourself.

Psychologists do not cease to assert -. They all, one way or another, express your attitude to what is happening. As we have said, if you are experiencing these feelings, then there are reasons for it. Plus, envy itself creates a feeling of inferiority and inadequacy in a person. For example, your friend has climbed the corporate ladder and become the head of the department while you have been working in the same position for three years without the slightest hint of further growth. Instead of washing his bones and attributing his success to universal injustice, audit your own activities. What's stopping you from moving on? Do you work a little? Are you bad at work? Are you underestimated by management? Shift the focus from a friend to yourself and try not to be a judge, do not hang labels - this is good, but this is bad. Focus on how to get what you want, not on what others have.

4. Try to forgive yourself and others

Forgiveness is an important step in the fight against envy, aimed at getting rid of anger and irritation. Whenever you compare someone else's success to your own failures, say out loud that you forgive yourself and that person. Forgiveness in this case does not mean that you turn a blind eye to someone else's shortcomings or wrong actions, but that you rather accept the success of another person and treat their achievements with understanding. Try to move from envy to compassion. Yes, for this you need to forget for a second about dissatisfaction with yourself and begin to appreciate not only what others have, but also what you yourself have. And one simple truth is hidden here: your attitude towards other people directly depends on how you treat yourself. If you want to stop being jealous, start respecting yourself. And first, forgive yourself for what you don't have. And praise yourself for what you have already achieved.

5. Stop looking at others

Success is a subjective and abstract phenomenon, therefore, like everything abstract, it simply cannot be calculated in a material equivalent. An apartment, a car, expensive clothes - a person may not have all this, but consider himself successful. And the whole secret is only to find not the best place of all possible, but your own, and not to postpone anything for later. Whenever you want to draw a parallel between yourself and another person, think that when you evaluate his progress, you see exactly what he wants you to see. Perhaps this person has come a long way and invested a lot of effort to achieve such a result, but he is profitable or he wants you to get the impression that it was easy for him. Remember, we all, one way or another, go through the same thing, it's just that someone gets stuck comparing themselves with others, and someone goes forward without looking back. Plus, the other person's success has nothing to do with you. Let's say your friend started exercising, eating right, and lost 20 pounds. Class, she challenged herself, but what's stopping you from doing the same? Of course, friend! An interesting job, a beautiful figure, a good education, strong relationships - you can have all this, regardless of someone else's success.

6. Be grateful and appreciate yourself and those who love you.

Yes, we speak common truths, but damn it, how difficult it is sometimes - just to appreciate those who are always there. If you look into it, it turns out that you are actually very lucky - you have friends with whom you can discuss your problems until the morning, parents who will endure you with absolutely any mood. In addition, you have another very important person who can solve absolutely all problems - it's you. If in doubt, then take the same sheet of paper again and list all your big and small victories on the back. Have you written? Now look at this list and think about what qualities this person has? Agree, not everyone can do what you managed to do. Take care of yourself and work on continuing this list, then you simply won't have time to follow what everyone else is doing. And if you are busy with your own development, then successful experience another person will not cause envy, but on the contrary, it will become a source of inspiration and motivation.

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